Friday, March 27, 2009

Friends Come and Go

We threw a St. Patricks day party. It turned out great, and we had a lot of fun. One of the ladies there, was my first friend here. Shes done a lot to make me question her attitude on things but i think i held on to her for so long because I love her son and like i said she was my first friend away from home.
Well everyone was having fun at the party, when all of a sudden she stands up gathers her stuff and storms out of the house. Then she came back in, grabed her son. I felt like i had to ask if she was leaving because i had a feeling she wasn't going to say goodbye. I thought she left because of her son was a little grouchy and ready for a nap. that turned out to only be part of the problem, she was just having family issues. Well me not knowing whats going on, and everyone else not knowing we all thought she was mad at someone or me.
Well to be honest i just ignored it. It bugged me but really not enough to say something a cause a confrontation about it. I hate confrontation, when my husband and i were dating i would always write him notes stating i had a problem with him. It took us getting married for me to tell him that he pissed me off w/out writing it out for him.
A few days after the party my husband and i were just talking about it, how much fun it was and ect. He then asks me what was wrong with blah blah blah. (im not going to state her name for respect for her) I said what do you mean? I think she was just mad because her son needed a nap and was having a melt down. He said oh i didn't know about that, i was talking about when she ripped her sons sippy out of Brocks hand. Shocked i said WHAT? I never saw that. He said ya i didn't say anything because i thought i might have been over reacting because i was drinking. But now that i think about it, i wasn't. I was ferious. I can forgive the way she acted at my house the way she left but treating my son like that i feel there is no excuse.
So i wrote her a email on myspace stating the way she acted and how i felt towards it. Hope read it and made sure it was more of a i feel then a attacking email:

Hey Blank
There are a few things bugging me about our party on Tues. I just want to let you know I still want to be your friend, its just you did a few things that upset not only me but Billy off too.

First of all Billy saw you rip one of Ben’s sippy cups out of Brocks hands. He didn’t say anything because he thought he might be over reacting because he was drinking. But as the days went along after that it started to bug him. I know that it wasn’t Brocks sippy but you could have just nicely taken it out of Brocks hands or made a trade with him for his sippy. I understand that it wasn’t Brocks but how should Brock no better when A: He’s only 15monhts old and B: you’ve let him drink out of it before. Please just don’t do that again it.

Also when you left. I know its hard watching a baby by yourself for 2weeks. But I’ve done it before, many of times, when I drove to Ohio when Brock was 8months old by myself. Also every wife in the section has experience the long working days where for weeks-months the guys just come home to eat and sleep. You think we get extra help with the babies? No. I know that w/out help you get stressed, everyone does. But when I go to your house or anyone else’s house with Brock alone and he starts to act out I keep my cool let you know I have to go because of Brock and you understand. We understood why you had to leave but you didn’t have to storm out of my house like that. I really didn't know if you were upset with me or someone at my house. If I upset you? Next time please let me know instead of leaving like you did.

I hope we can still be friends, because I like hanging out with you and seeing Ben, but the way you acted that day I felt was really rude. I hope we could just put this behind us. I just had to get this off of my chest. I’ll talk to you later.


I thought it was a really nice way of saying the way she acted i didn't like. All i wanted at most from it was a appology and for us to move on. At least for us to move on and her to never act like that at my house. Well she took it the wrong way. She wrote back, the first 2pharagraphed explained the why she acted the way she did. And after that i thought well maybe i'll write her back saying if she needs to vent i'm always here then i read the 3rd paragraph. That really upset me, and i'm in no mood to talk to her for awhile, i just need to cool down before seeing her again or replieing to her message.
She wrote:


First I would like to explain what happened with the sippy cup. I was sitting on the couch with ben in my arms trying to feed him a bottle to get him to take a nap. I had the sippy cup hidden behind my diaper bags and beside my leg. Brock must have leaned over them to reach it. By the time i noticed he had it he had already drank half of the juice. I did not have anymore juice for ben with me or at home. That was why i couldnt let brock just drink it, plus as you have said its expensive. When i was taking the sippy cup from Brock I was taking it how I normally do from him with very little force. He started to let go but when it started to come out of his mouth he decided to bite the nipple of the sippy and pulled really hard. I was caught off guard and if I had let go of the sippy cup Brock would have flown backwards onto the floor and hit his head. In that second I chose to have him go forward falling on the diaper bags so he wouldnt get hurt. Unfortunatly no one was watching Brock at the time and due to the fact I had Ben in my arms I was unable to retrieve Brocks sippy cup to exchange. I know it looked really bad but unfortunatly I was left with very little options. I am sorry that it turned out like that.

As I told you already I left for personal reasons which had nothing to do with anyone at your party. I will explain a little about why I left but not in great detail. I believe I have told you before my family is fighting. My dad tried calling me earlier that day at your house but I didnt answer because i thought he was just checking up. Since I didnt answer he later sent a text message telling me something that really upset me. My family issues have taken a turn for the worst and I needed to leave imediately to call my dad and find out what happened. I was really upset and im sure everyone saw and I was in no mood to explain in front of everyone. I did speak with you before I left and apologized for leaving so abruptly and I did tell you I would try to come back later. I needed to leave anyways due to Ben needing a nap, I didnt have his dinner, and the dogs needed to be let out. I even texted you later telling you I was coming back, but Ben was too tired for me to return. I wouldn't have said that if I had a problem with you.

I would have appreciated if you had come to me and asked in a nice manner what had happened once you first started thinking about it. The more you think about things the tend to get exaggerated in your mind and I do understand why you are upset, but you should always ask what happens before you jump to conclusions. I have been watching and taking care of kids since I was 13 and I was offended at your accusation that I was in some way trying to hurt your son. I also did not appreciate you contacting me by myspace it showed me how little respect you have for me. Please dont ask me to talk to you in person if I have a problem with you and you dont even give me the same curtesy. There was other was other ways to handle this situation and you chose one of the most disrespectfull ways to do it. You know how your husband has a problem with people cheating, I have a problem with disrespect. I have lost many friends because of them disrespecting me or someone I cared about. I would like things to be cleared up between us, but I know our friendship wont be how it used to be. Its going to take time for it to be back to normal. I would still like to hang out with you and Brock. Im willing to give our friendship a second chance. I hope you are too.


She texted me today asking if i read it and asking if we're still friends. I just told her i'm honestly offend right now being called disrespectful. Not to toot my own horn but i believe i am a very respectful person even if i don't like you (unless i get drunk the truth then comes out) But i try to be respectful, fair and nice to everyone i know and meet. I told her i would have to have time to cool down after the message she sent me and maybe sometime to think. I told her sry. She hasn't replied, so i think she just answered her own question.

In some ways i wish i never brought it up, but then again i had to say something about the sippy. Billy says it went down differently. And i'm glad i didn't see it because i probably be posting a blog right now about how i kicked someone out of my house.

Ugh, thats how i feel right now...i graduated high school...i should be done with this drama.

1 comment:

Miss Hope said... matter what you do....drama comes up. I hope this all works out for the best. Hang in there!